Longing to Belong Chapter 5: Choosing to Belong

From Chapter Five of Longing to Belong

As a college student, I was surrounded by the Greek societies of fraternities and sororities, and I was intrigued by the process of choosing to belong. I remember watching and listening to my roommate during Rush Week as she investigated the groups which she might choose and as she presented herself to be chosen. During the week, she went from house to house to learn the costs and the benefits of belonging to each: What were the requirements of a new pledge? What were the privileges she could expect? Of course, during that same week was the critical scrutiny of my roommate: Did she meet their standards? Would she fulfill their expectations of belonging which were clearly established?
At the end of the week, the invitations to belong were extended, and my roommate had a choice between two. But of course, she could only choose to belong to one.
Eventually, she “pledged” herself—her time, her money, and her allegiance—to only one. But the moment of truth came when she took off the old sweatshirt that meant nothing to her anymore, and she put on the new one that communicated to the campus to whom she now belonged.